Having a baby really changes you, sporadically for the better and others for the worst, however i feel like I am a more intense person now.
I am way moodier than I used to be.
I know it is stress, lack of sleep and added duties onto my plate, the anxiety I get when going to bed is just horrible. I know it is because my baby is a bad sleeper… He sporadically wakes up crying and I know I will have 1.5 hours of intense screaming before he goes back down, then sporadically he just flat out refuses to sleep. I get really concerned that my days are going to be bad; Due to my anxiety, I then don’t sleep and get even more anxious. It makes me not a wonderful partner, employee or person at the end of the afternoon. I have been looking into dosing with medical weed for the time being. I figure it can’t hurt… A little bit of THC and CBD should mellow me out. I am hoping if I am a bit high I can calm down and sleep. If I need to wake up and be up for 1.5 hours with a screaming baby, I want to be high for it. I know being calmer will be better for my child too. I know he feeds off my anxious, unhappy energy when he is screaming. It will also just be nicer being high sporadically to be honest. Thankfully I do live near a cannabis dispensary and they can hook me up with the right product.